Boundaries with Yourself

 

    To be able to set good boundaries in your life you need to be able to look at yourself, your choices, and thought process.  You have to take personal responsibility over how your life has turned out so far.  Decide what you need change to make it look like the life you want.  It all starts with the internal conflict and setting boundaries for yourself.

    Take a humble look at yourself.  Are you able to admit when you were wrong?  Are you strong enough to make internal changes to get the life you want?  Can you set boundaries for your own actions and attitude?  You need personalized boundaries on your diet, money, time, activities, words, substances, sexuality, and more.

    One word you need to learn how to use often is "no".  No can be a complete sentence for other people, but it is necessary for you to have boundaries for yourself.  If your life feels like it is out of control, then the next time someone needs something from you say no.  Simplify your life until you can see the light at the end of the tunnel.  You can't solve a problem until you are able to identify it, so give yourself what you need to identify your problems.

    You are your own worst enemy.  You need to learn how to love yourself the way God loves you.  Placing limits on yourself is a way to draw closer to God.  This takes being intentional and proactive.  If you know something will not be good for you, then say no.  Do not allow outside forces to push you into something that will not benefit anyone in the long run.  Instead surround yourself with people that will love you the way God loves you and give you wise counsel.

    Will power is not boundaries.  Will power will only get you so far.  Setting boundaries and learning self-discipline will push your further than will power.  Maturing in boundaries is not easy.  The only reason to persevere is to desire God's will over your life and establish healthy relationships.  

    You identify where you have boundary problems through identifying what causes your depression, anxiety, panic, phobias, anger, relationship issues, work problems, phycological issues, OCD, and other isolating issues.  Find the roots and start digging them out.  Burn them so they can never take root in your mind or heart again.  You have to understand where you contribute toward your issues to understand how they become sin to be able to destroy them completely.

    You need to be able to trust God, feel safe, rely on His grace, and allow the Holy Spirit to fuel you to really understand to make boundaries work in your personal life.  Identify the problem,  You have real needs, you fail, you accept feedback, deal with consequences, and become restored to make stronger boundaries.  

    You may have been a victim, but that does not mean you get to stay a victim.  Hurt people hurt other people.  If you stay the victim, then that means you are only hurting the people around you.  You make them the villain or responsible for you.  Neither are healthy.  Take ownership on how to heal and set firm boundaries to have control over your heart and mind.  Boundaries will help you heal.  You may just need a little professional help to get you to a certain point of healing and able to see things more clearly.  

Genesis 3:1-10, Proverbs 10:17-19, 17:27-28, 21:5-8, Matthew 12:33-37, Luke 11:24-26, John 15:1-8, Romans 7:14-20, 1 Corinthians 3:16-17, Ephesians 5:6-20, 1 Thessalonians 4:3-8, James 5:16-18, & 1 John 4:18-19