Boundaries for Children

 

    Family is the most important thing you can have in life.  If you are blessed with children, then you also hold a great responsibility.  Children need boundaries.  In every stage of their childhood they will challenge the boundaries in different ways, but they need to understand the word no.  Boundaries prepare them for the real world and there is no better gift than that.

    Boundaries help shape a child's values, school socialization, friend selection, who they will marry, and even their career.  God wanted us all to have family and children are a part of that.  Not everyone will have children and that is okay.  There is nothing wrong with you not having children, but they were part of God's original design for the family.  You see how He set boundaries with His people when you look at the Israelite nation.  They were rebellious and God handled the situation every time.  He did not allow bad behavior (aka heart conditions) to rule His people.

     The job of being a parent should bring you joy.  You can learn how to be a good parent even if you never had an example in God's Word.  A good parent helps their children grow up and mature to become responsible adults.  Boundaries teach your children on how to form strong attachments, bonds, and an understanding of who they are.  Boundaries teach children how to respect people.  The younger the child is when they get boundaries, the easier it is for them to be healthy and responsible adults that hold personal boundaries.

    Raising children is not easy.  There is no set way on how to do it because they are individual human beings like yourself.  That is why it is wise to take guidance from responsible adults in your life like grandparents, women in your church, or other people that bring strength into your life.  

    Boundaries teach responsibility, how to set limits, how to delay gratification, and makes growing up a smoother process for the whole family.  However, boundaries have to be age appropriate.  A toddler may need a time out or a spanking.  A teenage may need to have their phone taken away.  Boundaries should teach children consequences for their bad behavior.

    Boundaries are teaching children what is acceptable and what is not.  It takes trial and error, but the important things is not to give up on your children.  God never gives up on you or them.  Provide structure and teach them how to uphold it as they get older.  The best gift you will give your children is self-discipline.  

    Don't focus on the past.  Instead give your child room to figure out what they did wrong and a chance to change.  Look forward on how lessons can best impact your children and guide them not to make the same mistakes over and over.  Discipline comes from loving your children, not anger.  Make room for your children to make mistakes without fear, so they can learn to think for themselves, but have enough structure that they understand what they did was wrong and why.  You will learn wisdom and patience through the process.

    Children need boundaries to self-protect, learn responsibility, have self-control, freedom to choose, learn the value of waiting for something better in the future, and respecting limits of other people.  Each stage in life the boundaries will mature and their values will too.  This will be challenging for you as the parent, but the reward will be having children you can respect and be proud to be your children.  

Proverbs 22:6, Matthew 28:16-20, John 17:20-21, Acts 1:7-8, Romans 11:11-12, 1 Corinthians 5:9-13, Galatians 6:7-10, Ephesians 2:19-22, 1 Timothy 3:14-16, & 1 John 4:7-8