Boundary Success

 

    If you want your boundaries to work for your life and make your version of successful, then you have to mature in developing your boundaries.  It is hard work that will not allow you to stay in your comfort zone, but will be worth it.

    You have to work on resentment to be able to set good boundaries.  You have to be able to identify what is making you angry or frustrated to use it as an indicator that your boundaries have been crossed instead of being led by feelings.  If you never feel angry, then you need to figure out why.  Anger is normal and okay as long as it does not lead you to sin.  Face the truth and discover where your boundaries are weak so you can strengthen them.  Ultimately it strengthens real relationships.  

    As you mature your taste in things and people change.  As you heal you are drawn to other people that know and use boundaries.  You find people that will love you for who you are and will help you set better boundaries.  You need these people to set success boundaries over your life.  In time you will start attracting people learning to love boundaries too and you can help them.

    You need a family to help you in boundaries.  If it is not your family, then allow another family to adopt you into their family.  To be successful you need to be around people with the same Biblical values to help with setting limits and encourage you.  They will practice with you and share one spirit with you.  You are able to set firm boundaries because you have an emotional and spiritual support system.

    When you feel emotionally safe you are able to treasure what you have in life.  You are successful in boundaries because you have the truth and good people in your life.  You take personal responsibility for your mental health and emotional state so that you are not destructive.  This allows you to love others like God loves them.  It also allows you to receive love the way you need to be loved.  

    To be successful with boundaries you have to learn how to say no.  It allows you to grow emotionally and spiritually.  It will help you heal from past injuries.  You need limits to you.  It starts with baby steps to stick and not fall back to old patterns.  Start with safe people, so that when you work with resistant people you do not feel defeated or will crumble under the pressure.

    Boundary success requires being able to condemn your own bad actions, thoughts, and attitudes.  It keeps your conscience from going silent or being guilt ridden.  It drives you to be better and enforce your boundaries.  

    You need strong boundaries when it comes to communication.  You need self-control in conflict, scary situations, and relationships.  Make sure your life goals line up with your boundaries, so that there is no confusion.  This is where you set limits on yourself, not other people.  

    It will mature you in work, personal practices, and in your prayer life.  It makes it where you are honest with yourself, set well defined goals, and refine your character.  When you set internal boundaries you are able to deal with anything in life.  You do things that are good for you because you see the value, not because you are told to do it.  You discover value in love, responsibility, forgiveness, and accepting the truth.  

    Boundary success requires you being able to respect other people's boundaries in return.  This will confront your selfish nature, but enable you to love and have empathy.  People have set limits to themselves just like you.  Everyone's back ground is different, but everyone has the need for personal boundaries.  Respecting each other's boundaries will allow you to find common ground in life.    

    You will have boundary success in your life when you are free to protect yourself, nurture your relationships, and develop your life with God.  Boundaries is a form of stewardship over the person God created.  You need boundaries to mature, be proactive, and have productive conversations.  Ultimately they give you control over your life.  You no longer feel frantic, rushed, or out of control.  They give you direction and rewards.  

    You know you will face resistance, but that does not mean that other people can take anything away from who you are unless you allow it.  Steady your heart and be prepared.  Boundaries are not punishment, but a form of relationship building.  If a person decides that they don't want a part of it, then they are choosing to exit the relationship.  You never asked or wanted that.  It is not your fault.  It is their faulty character at that stage in life.  

Psalm 90:10-12, Proverbs 4:23-24, 10:17-20, 23:6-8, 30:21-23, Matthew 13:44-46, 18:15-20, Luke 14:28-30, John 1:16-18, 1 Corinthians 8:9-13, 2 Corinthians 9:6-8, Colossians 3:12-15, & 2 Timothy 4:6-8