Functional Boundaries

 

    Some people have a hard time with the functionality of boundaries when it comes time to apply them to relationships.  Functional boundaries are the boundaries that you are able to commit to and achieve.  It could be a task, project, work, school, chores, or anything else that you are expected to do.  It requires action, self-discipline, initiative, and planning.  Relational boundaries are boundaries in relationships.  You have to be able to speak truth or it will not work.

    Boundaries do not come naturally for everyone.  It will take some practice to get used to it.  You will have victories and failures when you get started.  Don't give up.  You will develop healthy and strong boundaries in time.  It always starts as a small child with your parents and other family members.  If you parent's never developed boundaries, then you are more likely to struggle.  If your family set healthy boundaries, then you will benefit by knowing how to have them for yourself.

    The important thing is to learn where your boundaries start and finish.  Take ownership of what is yours.  They are not inherited.  They are personalized because every relationship is different.  You are not your parents.  You were created by God for a purpose, so allow God to direct your boundaries.  

    Be truthful with yourself and your people.  Take responsibility for your actions and choices.  Find the freedom to be yourself in boundaries.  Use boundaries to love others the way God loves them.  Learn your limits and talk with God about everything you can't control.  He has control and will take care of you.  Set goals for your relationships to help direct or focus your boundaries.  He will reveal your blind spots.

    Do not become complacent in your relationships.  People are always changing.  That means your relationships are always growing or moving further apart.  It takes work.  It takes adaptability to change some minor boundaries to keep the relationship strong.  Never budge on your core boundaries like the 10 commandment kind.  Those keep people safe, not just their hearts.  However you can budge on small boundaries.  For an example, I don't like people showing up unexpectedly at my house.  However, if my neighbor has an emergency and needs me, then I am not going to destroy the relationship because she didn't call first.  

Proverbs 22:6, Matthew 5:33-37, Luke 10:38-42, Romans 12:1-2, Galatians 1:10, 6:4-5, Ephesians 4:14-16, & 1 John 2:12-14